Today's Post

Fact: 50% of the doctors practicing in this country today graduated in the lower half of their class.

Doctor: "Mrs. Larson, you're not going deaf in your left ear, you seem to have a suppository stuck in there."

Mrs. Larson: "Well now I know what happened to my hearing aid."

Medical Examiner's Findings:

1. The patient didn't die of anything serious.

2. The man had never been fatally ill before.

3. Cause of death is unknown as patient died
without the aid of a doctor.

4. Went to bed feeling on top of the world,
but when he woke up he was dead.

5. The cause of death was an act of God
under very suspicious circumstances.

6. The patient died in a state of perfect health

Actual Doctors' Names

Dr. Barker...Veterinarian

Dr. Hacker...Surgeon

Dr. Skinner...Dermatologist

Dr. Born...Ob-Gyn

Dr. Groth...Oncologist

Dr. Butt...Gastroenterology

Dr. Tickles...Pediatrician

Dr. Looney...Psychiatrist

Dr. Bone...Orthopedics

Dr. Gore...Emergency Medicine

Dr. Kidd...Pediatrician

Dr. Foote...Podiatrist

If you've got your health, you've got everything.
And if you don't have your health,
sooner or later your doctor has everything.

I've been thinking about you and...

I wish we could sit together
And have a cup of tea.
But since we can't,
When you get this cup
I hope you will think of me.

Friends are like four leaf clovers,
hard to find, lucky to have.

I value the friend who for me
finds time on his calendar.
I cherish the friend who for me
does not consult his calendar.

If I could reach up and hold a star
for each time you've made me smile,
the entire evening sky would
be in the palm of my hand.

Source: Internet